Friday, 11 November 2011


You know, I ceased to be a factor in the "blogosphere" because people were being stupid.

And yet it seems that in my absence, you have only grown moreso; how truly remarkable. When I think that you could not have possibly descended to depths which I had not seen yet, lo! What was I to behold but to find that not only had you reached rock bottom, but had brought out the power tools so that you could continue down into the dark depths of the very core of stupidity.

I think that we can all agree that the events we are confronted with are nothing if not surreal and supernatural. You could even say that they were unreasonable and illogical. But this does not mean that you cannot use your head; it does not mean that you must reject reason and logic. They are not so brittle systems that they can be easily dismantled by the presence of just one thing which "defies physics"; no, it defies physics as we know it.

But much like the lightspeed-exceeding neutrino, we must use our heads and change what we have to incorporate this "illogical" thing. If the neutrino is truly as ground-breaking as it appears to be, then physics as we know it will change. Physics does not destroy itself; nobody will abandon it.

We must do the same thing. We must simply take the logic we held before, change it to accept the Slender Man, and continue to use it.

It is on a related note that I will admit that I fancy that It is not really deserving of that name; it's a descriptive name, but it's a name that you idiots associate with fear and terror. Allow me to give it a name which you can find a little easier to stomach: the Greatest Game. Humans are the most dangerous game, but this thing is far more interesting to hunt.

But I dawdle from the point.

Accept that the Greatest Game exists, and that we are it's victims. Accept that there are other victims, and that there are servants of the Greatest Game. Now, think at what the best way to stop the suffering of the other victims is.

If you think that the best approach is solely to target the servants, you are stupid. The servants are only there because of It. Or, should I say, only It makes them a threat, because It gives them a focal point to focus themselves. If you were to remove It, the other cards in the precariously designed house would collapse. Or perhaps it wouldn't, but it would stop the ranks being increased, and their numbers would then rapidly dwindle.

But that's just what you're doing. Perhaps I have not looked hard enough, but you all seem to be... trying to do "heroic" things for the sake of heroics. You look into the devices It has created, you look into the traps; you downright charge into them, solely so you can brag about it later. If there was some rhyme or reason to this, it has escaped me.

To me, it looks like... you've lost sight of what matters. It matters. The Greatest Game; the ultimate enemy, to those who dub themselves "fighters". But they fight the servants instead of the master, and that is why they - or should I say "you" - are doomed to failure. You slice the head from the hydra, only to find two more in it's place; you do not hope to strike at the hydra's heart, so that you may defeat the beast.

You've all lost your way, and cannot find the path. Now, I have a simple request: follow me, and I shall show it to you. Soon, I shall outline the stages through which I shall slay this beast and bring us glory.

But, ahhh, first? I have a simple request. Solve my puzzle.

And before you ask? That blog is going to be the window through which you see the hunting of the Greatest Game.


  1. Herakles did not kill the Hydra by cutting its heart. He had his nephew Iolaus cauterize each neck stump after decapitation so that the heads would not grow back; then Herakles cut off the one immortal head of the Hydra and trapped it under a rock.

    Sorry for ruining your metaphor. Oh, wait, I'm not.

  2. What message WOULD they send. That I do not know.

  3. I consider myself a killer of real creatures, not fictional ones; well done to Heracles for triumphing over his monster, then.

    I am a puzzlemaster, not a player.

  4. A ceaser cipher and a riddle that answers easily as SOS, I was honestly a bit disapointed. Though I will credit you for reaizing that killing off proxies is absolutly no real victory at all for the hunted, that much is true.

    See you around

  5. Please forgive my brother. He takes things perhaps a bit too literally.

    I would love to help solve your puzzles. One must exercise the mind or else it will be lost.

  6. Trust me, dearie, you have to begin with the easiest puzzles, lest I force you to run away in fear.

  7. Ahhh, but I'm afraid that the answer is useless unless the right person has it in their possession.

  8. Well I would be more than willing to post it where Paragon can see, though admittadily I'm more intrested in seeing him figure it out on his own, it actually would serve all three of us better.

    See you around

  9. Cut off the head and the body dies. A viable approach. On the other hand, your ramblings often border (if not completely venturing into) a complete disregard and outright hatred towards your fellow man.

    "Get the shooting over and done with, you're all as good as dead anyway."

    "Don't get killed, guys.

    Actually, scratch that.

    Get killed, and take the people you're trying to save out with you. Cross out a whole bunch of problems."

    This does not inspire confidence. At all.


  10. For the record, such disregard for the clear aim of my tasks will not be granted reward. As it stands, I will allow it on this one occasion.

    As for you, Archivist, it doesn't matter. They don't matter. They're perpetuating problems; they encourage romanticism and idolisation of the shared situation among their kind, which only serves to make things worse in both the short and long runs. I have no desire to side myself with saboteurs.